In my defense, the servings-per-bag on the mysteriously vanished snacks were pretty low.  Five is low, right?

Whoops.

But also in my defense, most of the veggies I had purchased are also gone. That counts for something.

You should know that I have a degree in making justifications for my behavior.  Not really, but I should.  Hell, I could be a professor of justifications.

All that aside, seeing as I didn’t have any rice and bean chips left to make um… “nachos” with I had to resort to some real food for dinner last night.

And good thing, too. Magical things happen when I eat food that didn’t come out of a bag sealed with acrylic polymers.

Tuscan Quinoa
serves 2-3  (I portioned it out into 3 servings, but they were small)

3/4 cup uncooked quinoa
1 1/2 cups chicken broth (or vegetable broth, or water)
1/2 medium onion, diced
2 T chopped sundried tomatoes, packed in oil
1 clove of garlic, minced
2 cups fresh baby spinach
2 chicken sausage links (I used Trader Joe’s jalapeno chicken sausage)
salt+pepper, to taste
garlic powder

1. Rinse quinoa with cold water.  In a saucepot, combine quinoa and broth and bring to a boil.  Reduce to a simmer and cook according to package directions.
2. In a skillet, combine tomatoes and onion with a pinch of salt (to prevent browning- you just want them to sweat), saute for 2-3 minutes.
3. Add garlic to skillet and saute until fragrant.  Remove veggies to a separate plate.
4. Half sausages lengthwise and then chop into half moons. In the same skillet you used for the veggies, saute sausage until browned.
5. With a minute or two of cooking time left, add spinach leaves to quinoa and cover, allowing them to wilt.
6. Once quinoa is cooked, add veggies, sausage, salt, pepper and garlic powder to taste and mix well.

To be clear, I probably could’ve eaten that entire pot in one sitting.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s filling (thanks to the one-two punch of protein in the chicken sausage and quinoa), but I like bulk and this was durn tasty.

And no, jalapeno chicken sausage isn’t Tuscan at all.  I am just addicted to that flavor. TJ’s does have sundried tomato and basil and garlic varieties, though. So if you want to be all authentic go with one of those.

Oh, and don’t use quinoa, because it’s absolutely not Tuscan either.

I think we’ve learned here that one should disregard my use of recipe titles from here on out.

So I justify my behavior and make blatant false claims in my recipe titles, but at least I can feed myself a damn fine dinner every once in a while.

And I’m finally running out of snacks to demolish in my cabinet.

I’d call that a win.

I feel like I’ve been collecting colds like they’re pogs and it’s 1996.

Really, this is no surprise.  When I stay up late, go out and have cocktails night after night and don’t take time to recharge the proverbial batteries it’s not a shock that I haven’t been feeling 100%.

After a long weekend of good old fashioned R&R I’m feeling much better.  And although I didn’t feel up to blogging, I did manage to turn these leftovers into a pretty damn good soup.

Spicy Asian Noodle Soup
serves 1

1/2 cup cooked rice stick noodles, stir fried via this method
1-2 cups low sodium chicken broth (or vegetable broth)
1 T Sriracha (or to taste)
1-2 T soy sauce (or to taste)
2 T chopped cilantro
1/2 t fish sauce
1/4 cup edamame

Combine all ingredients in a sauce pot and heat over medium heat until simmering, adjusted spices to taste.

—————–

A pretty simple soup, but the heat and the spice felt good on my scratchy throat and cleared my sinuses right up.

So much better than canned soup.   And look, Ma!  All better!

There are two camps: those who are in gushy, vomit-inducing relationships who use the day to shout their love from the rooftops and those who aren’t.

There are sub-groups in the second camp: those who hate V-Day with a fiery passion, those who pretend to be happy for those in relationships/profess their love for their friends, and those who are barely aware that there is a holiday occurring.

I think I fall somewhere in the middle of all three of the latter.

The truth is, we all have an opinion about this day, whether it be pro, con, or focused apathy.

And I will say that it is good to have a plan going in to a holiday such as this one.  I therefore give you my tips for a successful Valentine’s Day for lovers and anti-lovers alike:

1. Eat dessert.  And when you DO eat dessert, eat it out of a plastic cup like a hobo.

This will make you seem nonchalant about the whole thing.

2. If your plans include eating the “world’s hottest wings” or anything else with the word “atomic” in its name, you might want to wash your face/brush your teeth/scrub yourself with a milk-soaked washcloth before you smooch your date.

Otherwise, he/she will be in for a world of hurt.  Trust me on this one.

3. If you’re going to cry about being alone, make sure you call a radio station to do it.

That way, the maximum number of suitors will hear your cry for love.

4. When dining out, make sure to order the surf ‘n turf.

Regardless of where you are dining.  And especially if you aren’t paying.

5. If you really want to impress your date, take her to White Castle.

(source)

Or better yet, up the ante with some help from Pizza Hut.

6. Two words: meat. bouquet.

Both romantic and a good dinner idea.

I’ll leave the double entendres up to you.

7. Don’t forget your beauty rest.

Dark eye circles are not becoming on any of us.

And because let’s face it, if it weren’t for Hallmark this would just be Tuesday.

Strange, no?

Tonight, after a weekend of bottomless mimosas, enchiladas, wings and fries, I’ve decided that it’s completely essential that I drag my butt of the couch and make myself something healthy.

And fast.  Seeing as I have a charity bingo night to attend tonight.

At 9 pm.  I may fall asleep before it’s over.

Luckily, I picked up some frozen shrimp (you should know that I pronounced “shrimp” like this in my head: “scriiimp” as I typed that) last week, which helps minimize prep and cook time.

You know what else cooks up quickly?  These:

These rice sticks have a cooking time of 3 minutes.  Can’t really beat that on a Monday.

Thai Shrimp Pasta Salad
serves 2

6 0z frozen, deveined, defrosted shrimp
1 cup shredded cabbage (I used green, but any variety will work)
2 small-medium carrots, shredded
1 large scallion, sliced on the bias
1/4 cup shelled edamame
1 t canola oil (or other high smoke point oil)
1 1/2 t fish sauce
1 t sugar (or other sweetener)
2 T soy sauce
1 t Sriracha (or to taste)
1 clove garlic, minced
1 cup cooked rice noodles
1/4 cup cilantro, chopped

1. In a small bowl, combine fish sauce, sugar, soy sauce, Sriracha and garlic. Set aside.

2. In a skillet or wok, heat oil over medium-high or high heat.  Add cabbage, carrots and scallions and stir fry until they begin to develop a bit of color.
3. Add noodles, edamame and reserved sauce to the skillet and stir fry until everything is combined and fragrant.
4. Add shrimp and cook until warm (I used pre-cooked shrimp, so if you have raw shrimp cook for about 3-4 minutes until pink).

This was done in 22 minutes, start to finish.  Take that, Rachael Ray.

Plus, a serving of this clocks in at just over 300 calories so it’s healthier than getting Thai take out (or really most kinds of take out).

If Monday night equals bingo night, I think I’m going to need some healthy fuel to get through it.

Thank you, scriiimp.

I don’t usually refer to myself as a “gal” either, but that’s neither here nor there.

I do like eggs, but they’re not usually the first thing that I go for.  Even for breakfast.

So the fact that this happened the other night is slightly unusual.

Seeing as I spent, oh, a tad on my Superbowl spread, and given that I was about to chew my arm off when I got home from work the other night, breakfast for dinner seemed wise.

And I had eggs that weren’t weeks past their expiration date in the fridge, which is actually somewhat rare.

I decided that a runny egg would be just the ticket on top of a potato. Because I’m weird, and runny eggs are pretty much always a good idea.

And then I lost my mind and overcooked the yolk.  It’s cool, though, it was still pretty tasty.  And fast.

Oh, and for the record, I’m not one of those cool people who actually bakes my baked potatoes.  I nuke them in the microwave.  6 minutes vs. 45 minutes?  Time is money.

Breakfast Baked Potato
serves 1

1 small-medium potato
1-2 t Frank’s Red Hot sauce
2 T Trader Joe’s caramelized onion dip (optional)
1 cup baby spinach
1 egg
cooking spray
salt+pepper

1. Wash potato well, and pierce with a fork several times. Microwave for about 6 minutes, depending on the size of the potato, until fork tender.  Or be cool and bake your potato in the oven.  That’ll work, too.
2. Once potato is cool enough to handle, scoop the flesh out of the skin and place in a small mixing bowl.
3. Add hot sauce, onion dip and spinach to bowl, season with salt and pepper to taste and mash everything together.
4. Spray a small skillet with cooking spray, heat over low heat and cook egg as desired (I like mine over easy…but that didn’t exactly work out this time.)
5. Spoon potato mixture back into skin and top with egg.

I ate this with a side of kale chips (sprayed with olive oil, red pepper flakes, garlic powder and a pinch of salt and baked at 350° for 10-12 minutes), which were the part of the meal that required the longest cooking time.

Dinner in less than 15 minutes and all for 300-350 calories?

Maybe I should reconsider my aversion to breakfast for dinner after all.

Whilst perusing the interwebs for Superbowl menu ideas, I decided that most of my offerings needed to be small and finger-food friendly.

What? I don’t like to wash silverware.

Plus, I’m a girl.  Girls love things that are mini. #fact

Enter, the mac ‘n cheese ball.  I used this recipe from Bread+Butter as inspiration, and then tweaked away.

Baked Mac ‘n Cheese Balls
makes about 25-30 balls.

8 oz dry elbow macaroni
4 oz sharp white cheddar cheese, shredded
2 T butter
2 T flour
1/2-3/4 cup milk (I used skim, but any unflavored variety will work)
salt+pepper
1 egg
3/4 cup panko bread crumbs

1. Cook pasta according to box directions until al dente. Drain and rinse under cold water.
2. Melt butter in a pan over medium heat.  Sprinkle in flour and whisk until a roux forms, allowing flour to cook for about 2 minutes.
3. Whisk in milk 1/4 cup at a time.  Stop adding the milk when the mixture is loose but coats the back of a spoon. Season with salt and pepper.
4. Stir in cheese and remove from heat.
5. Mix together pasta and cheese sauce until all noodles are coated.  I transferred my mixture to a baking dish and then chilled it overnight.  You only really need to chill it for a few hours, until it sets (it will keep the pasta from falling apart).
6. Place bread crumbs in one dish and beat the egg in another with a few splashes of water.
7. Break off about 1-2 tablespoons of pasta from the cooled hunk o’ mac ‘n cheese and carefully dredge in egg and then panko.
8.  Place “balls” on a baking sheet covered with parchment paper or a Silpat and bake for about 20 minutes at 400°, or until golden brown.

I really shouldn’t call these “balls” so much as “chunks”.  But the word chunk is only appetizing when referring to chocolate, right?

When I was first attempting to make these, I actually tried to roll them into balls and it failed miserably- maybe if I used a TON more cheese they’d stick together better, but I found that just cutting off squares and carefully dunking them in the egg/bread crumb kept them together much better and made the process a lot quicker.  So do that.

Regardless, you’re eating breaded mac ‘n cheese, so however you get it into your mouth is a win.

Seeing as I’m an obnoxiously overbearing and aggressive Bears fan and am not a gambling kind of lady, I was not all that riveted by last night’s game.

And, though I’ll admit that I wasn’t paying close attention, it seems like the commercials sort of fell flat, too.

But the food?

Ohhh, the food.

I labored over a hot stove for the better part of the day to prep and cook ALL THE FOOD. Mind you, I’m not complaining.  I’m one of those deranged people that actually finds chopping, stirring and roasting relaxing.

I do not, however, find slicing the tip of my finger off relaxing.  Don’t worry, I didn’t require an ER trip.  Nor did I bleed into any of the food, more importantly.

I made baked mac ‘n cheese balls:

Bev’s White Spinach Cheese Dip:

This was incredibly quick and easy- I would absolutely recommend it.  Just make sure to keep it warm, otherwise it’ll congeal as it cools.

Plenty of veggies and crackers with hummus and caramelized onion dip:

Chips, salsa and guacamole (obligatory):

Bacon wrapped dates, stuffed with Boursin cheese:

I actually cut the dates and bacon slices in half to make them bite sized and not quite so gluttonous.  And also so that I can get away with eating 6 (or 15) of them.

Trader Joe’s wings:

And buffalo chicken dip, thanks to my buddy Alison.

Plus, funfetti cupcakes and brownies that appeared later on.  And don’t worry, the spread was pretty well demolished by the end of the game.

And now that football season has officially gone out with a whimper (let’s be honest you guys), I’m ready for spring training to start up.

From buffalo chicken to stadium hot dogs.  Onwards and upwards.

Well, not this American.

Superbowl Sunday is my stomach’s glory day.

And the jury is still out whether the Superbowl or Thanksgiving is actually the most American holiday.  Well…the jury in my head is still out.

In honor of one of my favorite days of the year, I am hosting a bit of a shin-dig at my digs.  Sadly, Taye Diggs will not be in attendance. Dig. (“Say crack again.” “Crack.” <– name that movie)

Being that I’m not only a blogger whose choice of subject matter is generally of the culinary variety but also a blogger who uses any opportunity which presents itself to shove said blog down her friends’ throats, there is a bit of an expectation that I provide some good eats.

Thanks for all the guidance over the years, Alton.

 (source)

So what does this mean?

It means that I have been obsessively and meticulously writing and re-writing my menu all week.

I already told you I was a sick person, didn’t I? No one should really be all that surprised by this.

I’m also figuring out more than one way to work bacon into the day, because the people like bacon and I want the people to like me.

Here are some hints as to what I’m serving up:

Full menu details to come.

Let the gluttony begin.

I also think that this clip is especially ironic considering this was my dinner tonight:

Mashed cauliflower and … yup, those are frozen chicken nuggets.

I heard a story on the radio this morning about a 17 year-old British girl who collapsed because she had pretty much eaten exclusively chicken nuggets for her whole life and her body couldn’t take it anymore.

And somehow that made me crave chicken nuggets.

I am a sick, sick person.

Some weeks, I find myself coming home from work and watching marathons of whatever happens to be airing on Bravo or E! (I’m so proud of myself for admitting that to the entire internets right now) for several nights in a row.

This is not one of those weeks.

Out of the next 7 nights, I have exactly one night free due to work and social commitments.  Truth: it’s mostly work things. I’m not that cool.

The free night happens to be tonight.

As much as I love not having leftovers thereby necessitating a purchase of a lunch every day (read: I’m lying right now), I thought it would be prudent to cook up a big batch of something tonight in my free time to eat as leftovers this week.

But then, I didn’t really feel like spending my entire evening in the kitchen, so I needed to come up with something fairly quick.

You know what’s quick? Couscous. You pretty much just need to walk it by some boiling water and it’s cooked.

And because I’m fancy, I threw in all my spices.

Ok, not all of them, but enough to qualify this as an “ethnic” dish according to my expert and completely accurate culinary knowledge.

Moroccan Couscous
serves 4

1 cup dry couscous
1 cup chicken or vegetable broth (or water in a pinch)
1 can chickpeas, drained and rinsed
1/4 cup finely chopped onion
1 medium carrot, shredded
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 scallions, chopped
salt and pepper, to taste
3/4 t turmeric
1/2 t cumin
1/4 t cinnamon
1/2 t chili powder
cooking spray

1. Place broth or water in a saucepot, cover and bring to a boil.  Stir in couscous, cover and remove from heat.  After 5 minutes, or once all liquid is absorbed, fluff with a fork.
2. Spray a skillet with cooking spray and heat over medium heat.  Add onion, cook for 2 minutes.  Add garlic and carrot and cook for an additional 2-3 minutes, being careful not to burn the garlic.
3. Add spices to the vegetables and cook for an additional minute or two, until fragrant.
4. Stir vegetables, scallions and chickpeas into the couscous and cover for a few minutes to allow the flavors to marry.

This was done in less than 20 minutes and now I’ve got leftovers that are healthy, inexpensive and light (but filling).  It’s spicy but not hot and a nice change from the usual flavor profiles that I cook with.

Not bad for a Monday.