This is my cat.
She lives with my parents.
Her name is Dickens.
I named her that when she was a kitten (16 years ago) not after the famed 19th century author, but because she was…full of the dickens.
Yes, I was an extremely awkward and nerdy kid.
And the fact that I so eagerly shared that tidbit of information with you means that I clearly haven’t outgrown that phase.
Anyway, that’s all beside the point.
Whilst cat-sitting for my parents recently, I spied this bag of cat treats:
Dickens loves her some treats.
She screams for them. Didn’t think cats could scream? Well, they can.
Then I looked at the package a little closer.
What does that say in the corner down there?
2 calories, huh?
I mean, I know the cat has put on a couple pounds over the last few years, but that’s less than a stick of gum!
She’s just an old lady- let her eat her full fat treats.
On second thought, pass those treats over here.